Labelling Problems
In case you needed further proof
that the Human Race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label
instructions on consumer products
On a blanket from Taiwan
Not to be used as
protection from a tornado
On a helmet mounted mirror used by US
cyclists
Remember, objects in
the mirror are actually behind you
On a Taiwanese shampoo
Use repeatedly
for severe damage
On the bottle-top of a (UK) flavoured milk drink
After opening, keep upright
On a New Zealand insect spray
This product not tested on animals
In a US guide to setting up a new computer
To avoid condensation
forming, allow the boxes to warm up to room temperature before opening
(Sensible, but the instruction was
Inside the box.)
In some countries, on the bottom of Coke bottles
Open other end
On a Sears hairdryer
Do not use while
sleeping
On a bag of Fritos
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
Details inside
(The shoplifter special!)
On a bar of Dial soap
Directions: use like regular soap
(And that would be how?)
On Tesco’s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down
(Too late! You lose!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding
Product will be hot after heating
(Are you sure? Let’s experiment!)
On a Korean kitchen knife
Warning: keep out of children
(Dammit! Who are they to tell me
what to do with my kids?)
On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights
For indoor or outdoor use only
(As opposed to use in outer space?)
On a Japanese food processor
Not to be used
for the other use (Now I’m curious)
On Sainsbury’s peanuts
Warning -
contains nuts (Really? Peanuts contain nuts?)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts
Instructions - open
packet, eat nuts (I’m glad they cleared that up)
On a Swedish chainsaw
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or
other body parts
(What kind of consumer phone-call led to this warning?)
If you have any jokes please send them to me and I’ll add them to my site